No Higher Calling

Week 16

"O Lord, you have searched me and you know me.
You know my going out and my lying down; you
are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on
my tongue you know it completely, O Lord. .....
My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the
earth, your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me were written
in your book before one of them came to be."
--Ps. 139:1-4, 16 (NIV)

"For we are God's workmanship,
created in Christ Jesus to do good works,
which God prepared in advance for us to do."
--Eph. 2:10 (NIV)

Who's Responsible Here? Who's in Charge?

As I sit at my computer to write this devotional, I am painfully aware (read: anxious) about several high-level meetings to take place at the end of this week that it is my job to arrange. I am worried about the little details and the over-all impact of the meetings and hoping that everything will go well because much is riding on them. At the same time I am feeling rather guilty for having missed several deadlines with respect to this devotional and angry at myself for having to write it in the midst of all my other deadlines. I am a perfectionist and the anxiety can often be overwhelming.

In the midst of all this chaos and anxiety, however, someone said a few words to me today that made me pause long enough to put things in perspective again. I have known this person for only a short time and strictly in a professional relationship. Our church histories are widely divergent and we have no common acquaintances of which I am aware Yet, the first thing she said when we met was how many positive things she has heard about the conference I am organizing. Knowing my own insecurities and how many question-marks remain in my mind about these meetings, I looked at her with incredulity written all across my face. There was no way we could be talking about the same conference! But this was a conference about religious persecution around the world, right? She had me. It turned out that among other things, the pastor at her church had raised our meetings as an item of prayer in the congregation.

Later, as I meditated on what this woman had said, the Lord opened my eyes to the practical application of some truths that we in the legal professions are easily prone to forget (I speak for myself at any rate). I reflected on the thousands of people across this country who are praying for our meetings, some in passing, others battling as true prayer warriors on our behalf. My wonder at the idea that Canadian Christendom was behind me praying for these meetings turned to awe as I remembered the 100 or more lawyers across the globe whose prayers I had solicited through the Advocates' International network. I felt convicted for the way in which I had appropriated responsibility for the outcome of these meetings.

Yes, it is my job to organize these meetings, and yes I should take pride in my work and do a good job, as unto the Lord. But it dawned on me that I am not treading on fresh ground. True, I have never done this before; true the future is an open book and I don't know how these meetings will turn out. But I am not doing the work. I am not beating the path. I am simply pushing open the gates that lead down paths that were long since prepared in advance for me and my travelling companions. The gates were unlocked and the path cleared and trodden for me long ago, by God Himself. He knows the days of my life and everything that will come my way. My responsibility is simply in faith and trust in Him to walk down the road He has laid out for me, even in the smallest details that make up the work He has called me to.

It is true that I am blessed at this particular time in my life to work for a national Christian organization. I have the benefit of my work being of direct concern and interest to thousands of Christians around my country as well as millions around the world. But this fundamental truth applies equally to every one of us who is saved and walking in God's will. We in the legal profession are particularly apt to get caught up in the details and think we need to prepare the road as we work to rescue our clients or ensure the legal viability of their endeavours. We should never lose sight of the fact that God is our surveyor, cartographer, road-builder, and guide. He wants us to surrender the task of charting the course to Him so that He can achieve His goals through us.

Johanna Myyra
Canada